Written on September 5th, 2020
Yesterday, Big Sean dropped his 5th album, Detroit 2. I decided to make the album drop a special event for me, so I drove to my favorite spot in LA that looks over the skyline, sat on top of my mom’s Honda, and listened thoroughly to each track. I took notes, reflected, danced, and smiled.
A track that struck me the most was Everything That’s Missing. It reminded me of one of the first songs I ever discovered by Big Sean, that ultimately placed him in my top-music-artists-of-all-time list, Memories. Both of these songs have a theme of vulnerability, love, and gratitude for our life, even when things aren’t so peachy. A month ago, I was struggling with myself and the world I was socialized into, both filled with too many flaws. I witnessed my family relationships shatter before my eyes from my inability to manage my emotions. I was focused on everything that was missing from my life.
But yesterday night was a reminder that I am here and I am alive. I make mistakes, I feel very negative emotions sometimes, and that’s okay. Being alive means to remember the importance of putting my pride aside to tell my loved ones I love them in the midst of conflict. Most importantly, being alive means mustering up the courage to tell myself that I'm not the terrible person I convinced myself to be. And although this world isn't perfect, I will do my best to make it better.
After my Big Sean album recharge, today feels like a new beginning. It’s not New Year’s Eve; it’s an ordinary day, which is also worthy of resets and fresh starts.
It’s important to embrace your daily revelations - even if you already knew them. It’s okay to remind yourself that life is a paradox, even though you knew this for nearly all your life. With the daily quarantine routine, I believe you can be focused on something positive and beautiful by shifting your lens. You can easily be dissatisfied if you obsess over what's constantly missing from your life. But it's important to look in front of you:
When you’re taking your usual grocery store drive, look at your hands holding the wheel. When you’re talking, listen to your unique individual voice. When you’re angry at someone you love, look at them with the unconditional love you have for them. This summer has been excruciatingly hard for many in my life, but I know that we'll make it past the hardship by continuing to be present with ourselves and with each other.
I have a beautiful, abundant life. I may not always be the best person I want to be, but I will make it past my own adversity, because I am here and I am alive. If there’s anything you do today, I hope you can remind yourself that you are alive, you are here, your blessings are in front of you, your blessing is you. In the midst of the world crumbling, do hold vulnerability, love, and gratitude very close. If not from me, hear it from Detroit 2. My top three tracks from Sean Don are Everything That’s Missing, Guard Your Heart, & Don Life! ❤️️
Thank you for reading!